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 会馆娱乐: 孔子和如来佛



孔子和如来佛


作者:丁佑
   
    如来佛的额头上,有一个肉疙瘩,相传是孔子给弹得隆起的。
    一天,孔子才走进一座佛堂,就听到有人叫他。“孔仲尼,孔仲尼,你过来,你过来。”孔夫子闻声四处寻找,佛堂内没有一个人,只有泥塑木雕的如来佛,坐在莲座上对着他笑。孔子走上前,斗胆地指着他的鼻子说:“可是你叫我?”如来佛哈哈大笑起来道:“你是大圣人,我是佛祖,今天相逢,我俩就比试比试吧。”
    孔子看着如来佛,心想:“你是神,我是人,你有神法,我却有人的办法,未必会输。”主意一定,孔子立即爽快地应道:“好哇,如来佛,我们比什么?
    如来佛说:“我们都是斯文人,就比识字吧。谁猜对了,就在对方额上弹三下;猜错了,就挨三下。”
    孔子一听,高兴极了,他想,认字是我的专长还怕吗?想着孔子忙走近供桌,拿起香头,在香灰堆上划了一个“矮”字。如来佛一看,马上说:“这不是一个‘矮’字吗,这么简单,还来考我。”孔子说:“不对,这不是‘矮’字,而是‘射’字。左边的‘矢’字是箭,右边的‘委’字是表示一个人,这个人拿着弓箭,不是射又是什么呢?”一席话说得如来佛哑口无言,只好伸着脖子,让孔子弹三下。孔子心中暗暗寻思,平时你神气活现,这下我可不会饶你。他爬到如来佛身上,使出全身力气,在如来佛额上狠狠地弹了三下。
    这三下弹得如来佛眼睛直冒金星,额上顿时起了个肉疙瘩。如来佛暗暗想着:好哇,你孔子下手这样重,我一定要让你知道我的厉害。他忍着痛,含笑拿起香头,在灰缸里也划了一个字叫孔子猜。孔子瞟了一眼,就答道:“这是射字。”如来佛一把抓住孔子道:“这下看你还能逃过我的三下!”孔子有点心慌,忙分辨说:“明明是射字,怎会错呢?”如来佛用手点着“射”字道:“左边是个‘身’,右边是个‘寸’,身子只有一寸长,应该是‘矮’,而不是‘射’。”说完,如来佛摸摸额上的肉疙瘩,闭上双眼,右手作弹达,深深运了口气,准备狠狠地还他三下;当他睁开眼准备弹时,可孔子早已不知去向了。
    就这样,如来佛至今额上有一个肉疙瘩;而他弹指的姿势,是还想弹孔子那三下呢!
 

(作者:《福建日报·每周文摘》副主编)
 

本文发表于《东方龙》19908月第7


本文章来自 中国会馆http://huiguan.org.cn

这份报导的永久网址是: http://huiguan.org.cn/modules.php?name=GeRen&file=article&sid=265


贴出者为 Anonymous    贴出时间为 2007-06-03 04:07:47
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